Unfortunately I´m not exaggerating when I say that Norwegian restaurateurs/chefs/cooks/backyard grillers/and pretty much everyone else over here, wouldn´t know a truly great burger if the thing bit a quarter pound chunk out of their asses.
No, this doesn´t mean it´s impossible to get a good burger in Norway, but a truly great burger is a rare event. As an Oklahoman I have great burger in my blood. That does not mean there aren´t hundreds, probably thousands, of mediocre burgers, sold at restaurants around the Sooner state – each and every day.
Because there are.
There are truly great burgers in Oklahoma. El Reno is famous among foodnerds for its onion burgers, a very oniony, a tad meaty, burger, with roots going back to The Great Depression. One might think that all the El Reno Onion Burgers are great, but after a recent trip there I can assure you that although greatness is to be found, there is also not-quite-greatness.
The Onion Burger is a simple enough burger, and that´s one of the reasons greatness isn´t necessarily easy to achieve. I react to the lack of salt in most of these burgers, though the best of them achieve greatness even though they would be even better with a touch of salt (and pepper).
In May my wife and I took a trip to El Reno one Saturday morning. We skipped breakfast, loaded up on coffee and iced tea, and took the 45 minute drive from Norman. Our goal was to try ”The Big 3” of Onion Burgers: Sid´s, Johnnie´s and Robert´s. There was a 4th Onion Burger establishment, but they had recently closed. Looking back this is fine since we were big-time stuffed after ”just” eating at the three remaining restaurants.
We started off at Sid´s. This is the legendary restaurant that foodnerds love. And the onion burgers are very good. The fries are great, even though Sid´s chooses to still call them freedom fries (Come on folks, get a grip).
What hit me first was that Sid´s burger didn´t sing. The flavors were there, but it lacked that endearing quality (yeah, singing) that puts certain foods in a class of their own. The restaurant was full and we were given a short history lesson from the woman sitting next to us (she had actually worked part time at Sid´s and was there having her Saturday brunch). A good burger, but a bit of a disappointment.
El Reno´s Onion Burger establishments are all located in the 300 block, with only a couple of streets between each of them. And as good Okies we of course drove to each of them.
Second on the list was Robert´s. The term restaurant is not really appropriate for Robert´s. Sid´s could be called a diner, but Robert´s is an even simpler place which I can fondly describe as a dive. And don´t misunderstand, I love dives.
The burger at Robert´s was simply phenomonal. It was as good as any burger I´ve ever had. This burger sang three-part harmonies that The Eagles would be hard pressed to recreate. If I was a real man I´d have stayed longer at Robert´s. I would have eaten another burger, giving me more time to try and figure out just what the hell he was doing over at that grill. You should have been there …
Last stop Johnnie´s. The first thing that struck me at Johnnie´s was the size and ”newness” of the place. And I could easily understand why Johnnie´s was still in business. They fully understand the concept of marketing, and yes, I did buy the hat.
The Onion Burger at Johnnie´s was next best on this particular Saturday. It was very well-prepared, a burger I look forward to eating next time I´m in town. This burger sang, though it did lack that last little magical element the burger at Robert´s had.
One final note: I just can´t say enough about how proud I am to be an Okie. It´s an honor to come from a place (and of course to visit a place) so dedicated to protecting its traditional foods. Hats off to all the great people keeping these traditions alive.
Check it out:
Ja, jeg elsker svinekjøtt. Svinenakke er favoritten; alt som heter ribs, og skinken og koteletter og fileten. Jeg elsker bacon og svinepålegg, og alle varianter på skinke. Det er også et til stykke jeg elsker. Kjøttstykket er ytrefilet av svin, og når dette stykket blir grillet (dvs riktig-grillet), er det vanskelig å spise bedre mat.
For mange nordmenn betyr påskemat to ting: grilling og lam. 
Jeg kommer til å ha det langt mindre travelt enn mange andre folk når jeg skal i butikken for å handle inn mat. Grunnen til dette er at jeg kommer ikke til å bruke ett sekund for å lete etter Nøkkelhullet-produkter. Kommer ikke til å gjøre det nå; heller ikke senere.
The other issue is a venture I will be starting this coming week. I have again been lured, this time by a couple of my buddies: chef Stig and ex-cook Robbie. To make things perfectly clear, Stig is Norwegian and Robbie is Canadian. I am, of course, Okie, and there´s the rub. Stig and Robbie made the chili con carne recipe from the famous chef Heston Blumenthal. Blumenthal is maybe not Gordon Ramsey-famous, but in the world of fine dining, he´s right up there with Ramsay, Ducasse and the others. Heston Blumenthal is, by the way, British. The combination of gourmet chef and being British is for any good Southerner kind of like having your wife change the spark plugs on your monster car or believing that Bernie Madoff didn´t really do it.
I had a great time in the States this fall. The only real bummer, other than a couple of scary restaurant experiences, was the mid-term elections. The Republicans won pretty much everything, but worse than the losses were some of the things said about President Obama by the extreme far right.
