Women With Beards and Stoned Chickens

Photo: Mette Randem

I love chicken. A lot of (in their own minds) serious chefs laugh at the thought of having chicken on their menus, proving again that these guys are in need of serious help. Chicken is great stuff – when it is seasoned and cooked well. Poorly-made chicken is as awful as poorly-made broccoli or pasta or pecan pie. Well-made chicken is right up there with the best of dishes.

This recipe is for a whole chicken, marinated for just a bit or overnight if you remember to marinate it. The chicken is split along the backbone and flattened, then topped by bricks for even grilling. You´re gonna love this baby!

Here is the recipe. The Norwegian version follows the English version. Please enjoy!

Women With Beards and Stoned Chickens

The Monty Python gang had a hilarious skit in the film, Life of Brian (the film that was forbidden in Norway, and that the Swedes called “the film that is so funny that it was banned in Norway”).

In the film, Matthias (“son of Deuteronomy of Gath…”), is stoned by a gang of bearded “men” who have difficulty “deepening” their otherwise fairly high voices. Matthias is stoned because he called out “Jehovah!” (probably during a Sunday chicken dinner).

In this recipe, a whole chicken is grilled under bricks. The backbone of the chicken is cut away so that the chicken can be opened outwards (called, of all things, spatchcocking). The bricks are used to flatten the chicken for smooth, even grilling.

Serving Size: 4-6 people

Grill Method: Combined

Temperature: Medium-high

Preparation time: Approx. 20 minutes plus marinating time

Grilling time: Approx. 40 minutes, or a bit more, depending on the temperature in your grill and the size of the chicken


3 tablespoons soy sauce

1 tablespoon cooking oil

1 tablespoon salt

1 tablespoon ground black pepper

1 tablespoon brown sugar

2 teaspoons grated lemon zest

1 teaspoon onion powder

1 teaspoon garlic powder

1 large whole chicken


  1. Mix soy sauce, oil, salt, pepper, brown sugar, lemon zest, onion powder and garlic powder in a bowl.
  1. Rinse chicken in cold water and dry it with paper towel. Place chicken breast side down on the counter. Cut the chicken along the backbone from the neck all the way to the tail.
  1. Repeat the process on the other side of the backbone. Discard the backbone (or save it for making stock). Turn the chicken and flatten it completely out with your hands.
  1. Rub the chicken with the soy sauce mixture. You may want to start grilling right away, or let the chicken sit for a few hours or overnight.
  1. Wrap two bricks in aluminum foil (for hygiene’s sake).
  1. Place the chicken skin side up on indirect heat, place the bricks on top of the chicken and close the lid.
  1. After 20 minutes, remove the bricks and turn the chicken over. Place the bricks on top of the chicken again and close the lid. Continue grilling until chicken is done. Remove the bricks. Check by inserting a small hole in the thickest part of the thigh to see if the juice that comes out is clear. If you want a bit more color on your bird you can give it a quick run on direct heat.

Place the chicken on a platter and let it cool for at least 5 minutes before serving.


You can also use chicken pieces in this recipe. It is still possible to use the bricks, but remember that chicken pieces will need less time to cook.

This recipe is a perfect example for why disposable gloves are a great tool.


And now, in zee Norvegian language:

Kvinner med skjegg og steinet kylling

Monty Python-gjengen hadde en vanvittig morsom sketsj i filmen Life of Brian (filmen som ble forbudt å vise i Norge, og som svenskene kalte «filmen som er så morsom at den ble forbudt i Norge»).

I filmen blir Matthias («son of Deuteronomy of Gath …») steinet av en gjeng skjeggete «menn» som har litt problemer med å «mørkne» sine ellers nokså lyse stemmer. Matthias blir steinet fordi han hadde sagt «Jehovah!» (sannsynligvis under middagen hjemme; de spiste sikkert noe grillet kylling, vil jeg tippe).

I denne oppskriften blir en hel kylling grillet under murstein. Ryggbeinet på kyllingen skjæres vekk slik at kyllingen kan brettes ut. Mursteinene brukes til å presse kyllingen flat for å få en jevnere grilling.

Mengde: 4–6 personer

Grillmetode: Kombinert

Temperatur: Middels høy

Forberedelsestid: Ca. 20 minutter pluss ev. marineringstid

Grilltid: Ca. 30 minutter, ev. litt mer, avhengig av temperatur og størrelsen på kyllingen


3 ss soyasaus

1 ss matolje

1 ss salt

1 ss kvernet svart pepper

1 ss brunt sukker

2 ts revet sitronskall

1 ts løkpulver

1 ts hvitløkpulver

1 stor hel kylling


  1. Bland sammen soyasaus, olje, salt, pepper, brunt sukker, sitronskall, løkpulver og hvitløkpulver i en bolle.
  1. Skyll kyllingen i kaldt vann, og tørk den av med kjøkkenpapir. Legg kyllingen med brystsiden ned på benken. Klipp kyllingen langs ryggbeinet, fra halsen helt til halen.
  1. Gjenta prosessen på den andre siden av ryggbeinet. Kast ryggbeinet. Snu kyllingen og flat den helt ut med hendene.
  1. Smør hele kyllingen med soyasausblandingen. Du kan godt starte grillingen med én gang, eller la kyllingen trekke i noen timer eller natten over.
  1. Pakk to mursteiner i aluminiumsfolie (for hygienens skyld).
  1. Legg kyllingen med skinnsiden opp på den kalde sonen av grillen, legg mursteinene oppå kyllingen, og ta ned lokket.
  1. Ta av mursteinene og snu kyllingen når det har gått 20 minutter. Legg mursteinene oppå kyllingen igjen og ta ned lokket. Grill til kyllingen er ferdig. Fjern mursteinene. Sjekk ved å stikke et lite hull i den tykkeste delen av låret for å se om saften som renner ut er klar. Hvis du vil ha litt mer farge på kyllingen, gi den en liten tur på direkte varme.
  1. Legg kyllingen på et fat, og la den hvile i minst 5 minutter før den serveres.


Du kan også bruke kyllingstykker i denne oppskriften. Fortsett med mursteinene, men husk at kyllingstykkene trenger mindre tid.


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